Yesterday, while attending a birthday party for a 3-year old, I had the privilege of talking with the girl’s great-grandmother. Her observations about gifts really made me think about the shift in society from the thought of giving a gift itself, to giving themed gifts. As the little girl was pulling princess clothes and accessories from the bags, the great-grandmother commented on how elaborate the gifts were these days. She mentioned that when she was a child there were only a few gifts and they were usually hand-made. The time and thought required to create a gift probably meant far more to the child than the princess tiara that was simply grabbed off a store shelf and tossed into a shopping cart. Without a second thought, I responded to her with a comment about how the perception of gifts is a strong indicator of debt acceptance. Her generation didn’t believe in going into debt for anything other than a home. The focus was on life itself, not on the material things. It was a mindset that you worked for everything you had and if you wanted more, you worked harder. It’s a pretty simple concept that has been lost along the wayside as parents want to show their children how much they can give them. Perhaps psychologically, parents are making up for the long hours of work and super busy schedules.
At some point, we must have realized that a theme makes it easier for people to choose the “right” gifts. This idea of the “right” gift makes me chuckle. Are we afraid that if the child doesn’t like it, we will offend the parent? How about a lesson for our child in gratefulness? It concerns me that we are so pressed for time and short on energy that we have allowed our creativity be put on hold. Instead, we have allowed the world to hold our attention in a very unhealthy way. I am coming around to the mindset that a celebration of a birthday should be about friends and family; honoring the life of the child, and for that reason there is no need for a theme. A theme may be a way to show that we are better organized but, most children (especially under the age of 5), don’t even care about the plates and decorations being a certain way. The presence of food, people, games, and cake is all they care about! It’s not what they see, it’s what they do! This week, as we celebrate my husband’s birthday, I will teach my children that a birthday is a day to honor that person, not things.
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